odd and disturbing

I was in japan. Two lowest level yakuza idiots threatened me with knives openly on the street. I held them in place with magic and asked someone nearby where the cops were. they said they didn't know. I realized they weren't saying because they were scared that the yakuza would attack them for helping. Instead of the cops I had the two thugs tell me where they wanted to be taken and they predictably had me lead them to where they all hung out. They others saw that I was using magic to walk their friends around and let me in to see their boss. I explained that these people had been openly talking about how they were yakuza and that it could cause trouble for their organization. The boss agreed that they had made a mistake and would be punished. I told him that I was personally offended because they had offended me by their pathetic threat and if the boss would let me save some face and punish them for him. He agreed that since I'd helped them by bringing them there and keeping them from outing the organization that I would be allowed to punish them. I used their belts to make tourniquet on their right arms. I exchanged pleasantries with the boss while their arms went numb. There was an unmistakable feeling of danger in the room despite all the polite words. The yakuza were interested to see what I was doing and were also very likely going to kill me since they didn’t want anyone knowing where their hideout was. When they were ready everyone watched as, with just my bare hand, I crushed one dude's elbow so completely that it was easy to tear the lower part of his arm completely off. He screamed into a gag. Wielding the arm like a club, I slapped him with his own hand. I then shoved his dismembered arm into the ass of the other thug all the way up to the wrist so that just the hand stuck out. I repeated the processes with the second thug. I then put them butt to butt and made them shake hands. Throughout the process there were various terror responses; vomiting, pissing, shitting, shaking, as well as some clutching weapons and wanting to attack me. The boss sat there quietly the whole time never revealing his fear. Instead of secrecy, he now wanted to kill me because I was a terrifying threat to his organization. I told him that I believe that they were sufficiently punished and, with his permission, I would leave. He nodded and thanked me for my help. I left that audience room and had no sooner closed the door when a bunch of people in this room started shooting me with everything they had. The scene cut to the inside of the audience room and the boss smiled as he heard the gunshots start and eventually stop. To his horror I opened the door and showed that all of the people who’d tried to shoot me were hanging in the air about a foot off the ground; a black band around their necks preventing them from screaming or breathing. In syrupy tones I regretfully told him that some more of his men had offended me but instead of waiting for him to speak I snapped my fingers and the band around their necks constricted until it cut their heads off and they tumbled to the ground. There was a bloodbath of arterial spray. It splattered the walls and pooled on the floor but none of it touched me. I’d splatter against some sort of invisible barrier. In a shaky voice the boss apologized for his men and in a wheedly voice hoped that I wouldn’t blame them for their actions. I told him I wouldn’t but suggested that he might want to have someone clean up this mess. I turned and left the building. There were police outside. I was arrested. The dream broke down. Disjointed scenes of a police precinct. I had clammed up and demanded a lawyer. Lots of cops questioning me in various ways. I woke up and felt disgusted and disturbed

Harvard school of assassins

This dream was odd because I wasn't in it.

A young woman who looked like Emma Watson was accepted to the Harvard school for Assassins with a full scholarship. All assassins have to pick a educational discipline as a cover story for why they are at Harvard. She chose English Literature and Creative Writing. She ended up writing a couple novels and collaborated with the education and training schools to help rewrite NASAs training manuals. She was doing well in her classes but there was trouble with her dad. Her dad, who had worked 25 years in factory before being replaced by a robot, did not approve of writing as a career. He had no idea she was learning to be an assassin as well and she wasn't allowed to tell him. One Christmas her father and mother came to visit and check in on her and she and her father were having and argument about it. She was getting frustrated because she knew that if she told him what she was really doing that he'd be okay with it but she couldn't and her father was feeling upset because he didn't feel this was going to help her in the long run and he was worried for her long term well being. Meanwhile the mom was trying to smooth things over with both of them. During one particularly heated exchange there was a cough from the shadows; one of the woman's class mates and friends who for some reason was Jon Snow from Game of Thrones had been lurking to make sure she was okay. She nonchalantly signaled that he should stay hidden and eventually got her dad to leave by tearing into him and his emotional insecurities. I remember the line "Writing isn't a good job? Hows working for 25 years for people half your age only to get replace my a mindless robot who is better at your job than you were"

The dream got weird after that. One of her professors saw this and thought she was too emotional so assigned her a class with some weird monk assassin who tried to train her to calm her emotions and teach her to make tea. He was a goofy weirdo but apparently was very good at killing people and teaching.

haunting in the woods

Some friends of mine asked me and my friend Doug to come with them to search for a haunted house way out in an old forest. We geared up for spirits, ghosts, and large horrible woodland monsters and grabbed the 4x4 and drove as close as we could get to where we'd be looking. The geography prevented us from driving closer so we had to hike a bunch of stuff in. We easily found the house in the forest. The trees were not too densely packed and were large with a dense canopy that dimmed the sun. The forest was eerie; some combination of the trees and the leaves made it sound quiet and filled it with whispers. There was no road up to the house. There were no signs of civilization anywhere but here was this white two story colonial in moderately good repair. The windows were in tact but the paint was peeling in places. the rest of our friends hooted with joy at the discovery and eager went though the unlocked door into the house. Several trips were made from the vehicles to the house to bring in supplies. The house was thoroughly investigated and my friends were disappointed to find no secret passage ways or dead bodies or anything except and old forgotten home. There were no pictures on the walls and most of the furniture had been cleared out. There were plates in the kitchen, an old water pump which had good water in it, a wood burning stove. Everything was dusty. My friends and I cleaned house; everything was swept and washed. Fresh firewood was chopped for the stove and the fireplaces. It soon got dark and my friends, disappointed that they didn't find anything spooky, went to bed happy as they anticipated a enjoyable vacation in the woods. Doug and I slept less soundly. There was an odd presence here. It felt like we were being watched. We resolved ourselves to investigate further in the morning.

Dawn came and with it no surprises. Maps where laid out and inspected. There was a lake not far from us and our friends decided to hike out to it to go swimming, fishing, hiking, and hunting. Meanwhile Doug and I got to work securing the house from anything supernatural. I set down a magic circle of protection to keep thing out and Doug started inscribing runes into the windows and doors. I finally found some lesser forest spirits; the ghosts of dead old trees. They warned me that we should leave as there was a dark spirit that slept in that house and that humans in general were not welcome in this area. I assured them that we'd be leaving soon and would try not to disrupt anything. With an air of disbelief the spirit vanished. Our friends returned with fish and rabbits. Our friend Dan the hiker said he didn't feel well and was gonna turn in early. The rest of our friends were oblivious to the growing sense of tension building in the air.

The next day was when things went down hill. Doug and I woke up to shrieks and screams. One of our friends (nameless) had been possessed by a poltergeist and Dan had been possessed by a fallen tree spirit. Nameless was giggling to himself and occasionally cursing as he crawled along the walls and ceiling and Dan just floated upright a foot off the ground; his eyes coal black and head lolled to the side. The fallen tree spirit was mad at all humans because they had burned down his tree. It wasn't hard for us to convince it that Dan didn't deserve this as he was a hiker and loved the forest, so the spirit left. The poltergeist was much tougher. It was strong and didn't care about anything but tormenting people. We could hurt the poltergeist since it was borrowing our friends body but that would hurt our friend also. We had our friends distract the poltergeist as Doug and I went down to the living room and made a binding circle. Once were ready we went up to the room and all of use jumped the poltergeist and tied it to the bed and then sealed up the room hoping that boredom would get the poltergeist to discorporate which it did. Intangible the monster came at us and got trapped in the binding circle where we bound it to a rock. We buried the rock under the stone floor of the basement in a bag of salt. Our friends had lost their childlike joy for the place. We rested up and as soon as everyone was ready we left. Doug and I returned to help put the fallen tree spirit to rest and to appease the spirits of the forest. We then pledge to never come back.

Murder at the Pit

I was in a movie with a small bit part. It was something like Journey to the center of the earth or a remake of the abyss. We were filming at an old cave that had a deep drop. I was reviewing some photography and one actress who had few images the night before suddenly had over 100,000 images. Turns out she had died by falling in the pit. Sherlock Holmes didn't think it was an accident. He decided to show up in disguise and start investigating. I was the only one who knew he was sneaking around but I didn't know what he looked like. Everyone was freaked out but trying to soldier on. Sherlock started interviewing everyone trying to find the murder and I freaked out because even though I hadn't killed the actress Sherlock always discovers something embarrassing about you and I didn't want him airing my dirty laundry. I panicked and woke up.

not so wild west

last night was strange. western civilization had collapsed I'm not sure why. There wasn't gas for cars, trucks, or airplanes so travel was greatly restricted. Everything had a more wild west settler vibe to it. I was a traveling tinker. I went from town to town fixing things and teaching people how to get by without abundant electric. I took scrap metal and melted it down and refined it so it could be cast and shaped to replace broken parts. I would pay people with work for things I needed and traded when I could. I also brought news and maps. There wasn't much else to it.

worst job ever; a dream

I was the caretaker for dark souls 3. I did all the repairs and upkeep. Made sure the crystal lizards got exercise so they'd be fast, filed down the giant crystal monsters so they wouldn't get in their own way, maintained all the switches/levers/elevators, restocked ammo for all the giant archers, replaced boxes/barrels that people kept rolling though, played fetch with the horrible monster dogs, fed the dragons, got employee of the month for figuring out how to only light the candles and torches when someone was around which saved a bunch of money, general repairs/disrepairs for buildings, etc ..

generic batman ripoff

I had discovered that fellow billionaire Bruce Wayne was batman and I wanted to do that too only I saw it more like a hobby and didn't go out much. I mostly used it as an excuse to build a secret mancave in my mansion, buy some fancy cars, and do parkour across the city for exercise. I "fought" against a villain that was one part Joker and one part Riddle called the Giggler. We "fought" by him leaving geocaches of jokes and puns that were clues to the next spot like a scavenger hunt. If i completed them all in a set time and found him he'd take me to lunch and if i didn't find him in time i'd take him to lunch.