Thursday, January 13, 2011


Some jackasses can't take a hint.

I'm at work, my cell phone rings, and I answer.

THEM: "Hi, I'm from the company that warranties your car. Did you know your warranty has expired?"
ME: "I am not interested in anything you are selling, Goodbye."


10 seconds later the same phone number rings me back. I answer and start talking before they can start.

ME: "What part of 'I'm not interested' don't you get?"


Amazingly they call back a third time about 2 seconds later. They rush to get their foot in the door.

THEM (obviously upset and hurried): "Sir, I'm not selling anything! I just wanted to make sure you knew that your warranty has expired!"
ME (choking on my own rage) : "I know my warranty expired. Your company sent me 4 post cards explaining that is was expired and tried to sell me a new warranty. The warranty I got with my car wasn't very good and the renewal warranty was even worse PLUS it cost me money. I didn't reply to any of the mail you sent me and I've hung up on you TWICE! What makes you think I care about my warranty AT ALL?!

(this person then said something unthinkably stupid)

THEM: "So you are aware that your warranty has expired? Would you like to renew it?"

(at that point an aneurysm burst in my head and I died)

Monday, January 3, 2011

Aimlessly Adrift

Once in a while
perhaps at great length
I'm given to dither with prose

I scribble and doodle
with stanzas and stout
But none of it good I'll disclose

A purposeless life
is a ship without rudder
Its actions are float, drift or sink

A directionless journey
with no destination
Leaves its crew little recourse but drink

Through the fog and the rain
they keep at their tasks
Though the fear darkened night keeps them wailing

but a light they will find
and somewhere to dock
so long as they've will to keep sailing

to redouble their grip
is the core of their craft
if they want to leave their location

but starving for options
they're left little choice
as they've been pressed to their current vocation

no matter the ship
no matter the crew
we've all a journey to make

either make a choice
on where you would go
or it'll be made inspite of your sake